This post is all about body shaming. These are the terms and concepts of body shame that every Christian woman with a negative body image needs to know about.

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Remember that moment?

When you first heard those whispered body-shaming words?

When someone made you feel like your body wasn’t right? It might’ve been a careless comment from a loved one or a look that made you doubt yourself.

Ouch… it was like a sting to your heart, right?

If you’re anything like me, body shaming started very early in life…

You probably had body shamers or maybe you were ashamed of your body because of diet culture’s “skinny = beautiful campaign” — that distorts your view of beauty.

But guess what…

Today, you’re gonna learn how to free yourself from the chains of body shaming — PLUS tips on how to embrace a healthier relationship with food.

My prayer is that you recognize that your body is a beautifully unique creation of God, deserving of self-love and respect.

Body Shaming

WHAT'S INSIDE show

Battling Body Shame…

It was a perfectly tropical-breezy summer day in Puerto Rico. A memory vividly etched in my mind stands out.

I was a teenager at the time…

Spending the day at the beach with my brother Sam and some friends…

While my friends splashed in the water, I stood there, paralyzed by the thought of removing my bright orange, super-long (down to my knees) t-shirt.

Sam encourages me, saying, “Take it off, you look great!” Yet, that one dimple on my right thigh had a hold on me….

Instead of enjoying the day, I kept my shirt on and spent the day consumed by thoughts of how terrible and fat I felt…

(And if I can be vulnerable for a moment… I was told that my curvy-voluptuous body got me into trouble — a.k.a. sexual molestation. So I was already insecure about my looks and on top of that I felt like I was being punished because of my body shape.)

And for decades, the enemy held me captive… I wore clothes that hid my curves and I had a distorted body image.

Even now, as I journey into my fifties and my body changes, I still battle with self-body shaming and a negative body image — but grace…

Can you relate?

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Regrettably, it only takes that one look — that one passing remark — or even just a tiny seed of doubt — and the influence of diet culture (find out more about diet culture here) leaves its mark on you.

So, let’s get into the meaning of body shaming…

What is Body Shaming?

Well, here’s how the doctor in psychology, Alice E. Schluger, defines body shaming…

“Body shaming involves humiliating someone by making inappropriate or negative comments about their body size or shape. As well as “fat shaming,” you may also hear negative comments if you’re underweight or in reference to a specific body part.

This type of criticism can be made to others or yourself. You may feel unhappy with your weight or how your body looks and judge yourself harshly. You may even engage in negative self-talk, such as “I feel so fat today” or “I need to stop stuffing my face with food.”

The act of body shaming can be carried out in person or remotely via the internet and social media and can be done by your parents, siblings, friends, or people you’re not even close to.

Even in a joking manner, remarks about what you eat or how much food you consume constitutes body shaming. Giving someone advice about dieting or praising weight loss is also considered body shaming, whether intentional or not. Often, your friends and family members don’t want to hurt your feelings, but their comments can still be of a critical nature. They may not realize the negative effect that questions like “Have you lost weight?” or “Do you really need to eat all of that?” can have.

While nobody is immune to societal pressures to look a certain way, comments about your body are unnecessary in any context. Whether the body shaming is being done by yourself or others, there are ways to overcome the problem, build body positivity, and learn to look at yourself in a more compassionate and realistic way.”

15 Examples of Body Shaming

Let’s break down the doctor’s examples of body shaming into bite-sized points:

1. Saying inappropriate or negative things about how someone’s body looks or its size.

2. Making fun of (or fat-shaming) someone for being bigger than what you think is okay.

3. Criticizing certain parts of someone’s body.

4. Being really hard on yourself because of how you look or how much you weigh.

5. Telling yourself negative stuff like “I feel so fat today” or “I shouldn’t eat so much.”

6. Hurting someone’s feelings about their body when you’re together in person.

7. Body shaming someone online or on social media platforms.

8. When your closest relatives and friends body shame you.

9. Talking about what someone’s eating or how much they’re having in a mean way.

10. Giving advice about diets or saying someone looks better (praising them) because they lost weight.

11. Saying things that might sound like jokes but still make someone feel bad about their body.

12. Asking questions like “Did you lose weight?” or “Why are you eating so much?” can make someone feel bad.

13. Feeling like you have to look a certain way because of the unattainable standards set by diet culture.

14. Saying unsolicited things about someone’s body.

Here’s one that makes me REALLY mad…

15. When diet culture makes its way into a sermon — you might get a “your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit…” tossed at you in connection with dieting. (By the way, the context of this verse relates to sexual immorality – it does not refer to dieting and exercising.)

I want to tell them that’s not right SO BADLY! But instead, I think WWJD (what would Jesus do)… And I’m reminded to practice grace 🙃.

The 5 Painful Effects of Body Shaming

In fact…

Most people don’t mean any harm — they just don’t know any better.

The bottom line and truth is your body is a gift made by God. But sometimes, people say things that make you feel like your body isn’t good.

They’re wrong!

Your body is not the problem — it’s the way we as women think about it that can be a bit messed up.

“God saw all that He had made, and it was VERY GOOD…”
Genesis 1:31 (emphasis added)

You’re WAY MORE than just your body!

With that said, you may need healing from the profound psychological effects of body shaming…

I’ll mention the 5 known effects but we’re going to focus on the number one psychological effect of body shaming.

5. Physical Health Issues

4. Anxiety & Depression

3. Too Much Exercise

2. Body Dysmorphic Disorder • BDD

The #1 psychological effect of body shaming is Eating Disorders

Eating Disorders

Having a negative body image is the main cause of developing eating disorders like anorexia, bulimia, or binge eating.

You might try a diet where you restrict — eat very little to change your shape or size. But this kind of diet can lead to harmful behaviors like…

skipping meals
not eating
throwing up after eating
doing too much exercise
or using laxatives too often

After a while, your body and brain don’t get the essential nutrients they need to stay healthy.

On the other hand, you might neglect your body by…

eating past your “full cues”
consciously overeating
not moving your body at all

And that is why…

I encourage you to practice acts of self-kindness and self-love.

Start in the kitchen…

Get excited about preparing the dishes you love and share them with others…
Explore your cultural foods…
Express your creativity…
Try new appliances (I love gadgets!)…
Build confidence and trust in yourself…
Invite other women you love into the kitchen with you…
- share personal experiences or stories with them
- share your journey of overcoming body shaming and speak life into them!
- pray together
- break cultural and generational curses!

And lastly, enjoy your food 😋

As we come to a close, I want to leave you with this…

How Do You Respond to Body Shamers?

Choosing God’s Voice Over Diet Culture

So you’ve learned that in today’s world, there’s a lot of talk about diets and how we should look a.k.a. diet culture.

But here’s the truth…

You have a choice.

You can listen to the negative messages of diet culture…
Or you can choose to hear the loving words of God.

God made you unique and special, and He loves you just the way you are. When you listen to God’s voice, you’ll find that you’re already beautiful and worthy.
wanda • grace abounds wellness

Remember, the messages from diet culture can be loud, but God’s love is louder.

He says you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), and He loves you no matter your size or shape.

When you choose to listen to God’s voice over diet culture, you’ll find true confidence and a healthier view of yourself.

God’s Love: Your Unshakable Foundation

God’s love is like a strong foundation that can’t be shaken…

He loves you no matter what…

You don’t have to change how you look to earn His love. His love is unconditional, lavish, and endless.
wanda • grace abounds wellness

When you’re feeling unsure about yourself…

Remember God’s love. Remind yourself that His love for you is unchanging.
Ground yourself in this truth.

You can even try this…

close your eyes
take a deep breath
and imagine God’s love surrounding you like a warm embrace

It’s okay to have moments of doubt, but when those moments come…

practice self-compassion
treat yourself with kindness, just like God does
remind yourself that you are His cherished creation — He made you with care and purpose.

Embrace Your Identity as God’s Cherished Daughter

You’re SO much more than a body. You are a beloved daughter of God. Let that sink in…

Your worth isn’t determined by how you look or what diet culture says. It’s determined by the fact that you are God’s creation.
wanda • grace abounds wellness

When you look in the mirror, see yourself through God’s eyes. See the beauty that He sees in you. Be gentle with yourself, just as God is gentle with you. Embrace your daughtership and let that love guide you.

In those moments of doubt…

Remind yourself of God’s love.
Surround yourself with positive reminders of His truth.
And most importantly, show yourself grace.

Just as God loves you, love yourself. You are unique, valuable, and deeply loved by the Creator of the universe.

My prayer for you is that my decades of experience of — an all-consuming battle with the scale — self-esteem struggles — and how God has radically worked on my heart will bless and inspire you!

You’re Invited…

You have an open invitation to binge on all of my posts — written with Holy Spirit-inspired words and filled with love just for you — my beautiful friend.

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Thank you for joining me on this journey. You are loved, precious, and wonderfully made.

Posted By: Wanda · In: Mindset