15 Ways to Overcome and Let Go of Perfectionism

This post is all about overcoming perfectionism and how to let go of perfectionism. Are your high standards and high expectations actually perfectionist tendencies? Read on to find out!

Have you ever found yourself caught in the trap of perfectionism? 

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Do your high standards and fear of failure dominate every waking moment? 

If so, you’re not alone…

I honestly wish I’d learned how to let go of perfectionism a looooong time ago… 

Because it would’ve saved me countless anxious, sleepless nights! 

Tell me if you can relate…

You’re lying in bed at night — replaying your day — thinking of all the things you could’ve done better or said differently.

You constantly worry about what people think of you — will they like you?

You feel awkward in social settings and you can’t stop the negative self-talk.

(I can almost see you nodding yes.)

Do you know what those thoughts are rooted in?

It’s F E A R — the root cause of perfection.

The fear of failure overwhelms you — the fear of not looking a certain way, the fear of acting a certain way, the fear of not being enough…

But fear not — you’re not alone in this struggle! 

The truth of the matter is that these feelings are super common — especially among Christian women. And the good news is — you can absolutely change your perfectionistic ways 😉.

And that’s why today, we’re going all in on overcoming perfectionism and 15 practical ways to let go of perfectionism. Each strategy is designed to help you reduce the pressure and start living a more joyful life — rooted in Christ’s grace! 

In part one of this perfectionist series, I covered the root causes of perfectionism in detail: What’s the Root Cause of Perfectionism | 6 Causes. There, you’ll learn about the WHAT. The next step is to jump into the HOW — how to overcome and let go of perfectionism.

Ready? Let’s go…

How to Let Go of Perfectionism 

What are the Negative Implications of Perfectionistic Tendencies?

One of the biggest challenges of striving to be perfect and putting intense pressure on yourself to produce a flawless level of performance is that it can negatively impact your mental and emotional health.

Trying to meet unattainable standards can leave you feeling anxious and with low self-esteem. Constantly worrying about reaching high expectations can be draining and overwhelming — leaving you exhausted. And failing to meet your goals can make you feel disappointed, inadequate, worthless, and depressed.

What are the Benefits of Letting Go of Perfectionism?

When you let go of perfectionism, your personal growth and mental health thrive. Finding that balance of healthy striving and “doing life” out of a place of love aligns with God’s word and allows room for self-compassion and acceptance.

You get to embrace your flaws and experience God’s forgiveness and love more fully. This helps you be kinder to yourself and grow from your mistakes rather than being paralyzed by them — leading you to a healthier, more joyful life rooted in Christ’s grace.

15 Ways to Let Go of Perfectionism

As we explore these 15 practical ways to let go of perfectionism, note that no matter which strategy you choose to adopt, the first one is the most important and should always be your foundation. 

Value Yourself for Who You Are teaches us that our true value isn’t about how much you achieve but about Whose you are — a beautiful daughter of God and who you are inside — your character and God-given qualities. Always keep this in mind as you try these steps, and let it be your guide in all you do!

1. Value Yourself for Who You Are

Your worth isn’t tied to your accomplishments or the high standards you might set for yourself. Take time to identify and appreciate your values — kindness, generosity, faithfulness. These qualities define you more than any external success. 

If you’ve followed this blog — you know I often say: Your TRUE worth and value aren’t tied to how you look or what you do. It comes from who you are — a cherished daughter of God. Embracing this truth and seeing yourself as God sees you is key as you start to let go of perfectionism and build a healthier relationship with yourself.

2. Set Realistic Goals

The first step to let go of perfectionism is to set goals that match your capabilities rather than aiming for impossible standards. This shift helps you reduce the pressure and allows you to celebrate smaller victories and progress.

Understand the difference between high standards, which motivate and push you forward, and unrealistic standards, which set you up for failure. Aim for attainable goals like improving a skill step-by-step instead of expecting instant expertise, which fosters progress over perfection.

3. Take a Deep Breath and Reflect

When you feel overwhelmed by perfectionistic tendencies, pause and take a deep breath. Reflect on past experiences where simply being good enough (not perfect) led to success. This can help shift your mindset towards seeing each challenge as a new opportunity to learn and grow.

Additionally, think about what might have nurtured your perfectionist tendencies so you can identify any patterns that trigger these behaviors. Use prayer or meditation as tools to deeply explore and understand these roots, which will help you address and ask God to heal them.

“Life doesn’t require perfection to be fulfilling.”

4. Embrace Mistakes as Learning Opportunities

Letting go of perfectionism means accepting that mistakes are a part of life and a great opportunity for personal growth. Next time you slip up, instead of beating yourself up, see it as a chance to learn and improve. Every mistake becomes a practical step towards improving yourself.

Understand the difference between a growth mindset, which sees challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, and a fixed mindset, which views skills as static and unchangeable. Adopting a growth mindset helps reduce the pressure of perfectionism by reframing challenges as opportunities for improvement rather than tests to pass perfectly.

5. Avoid Comparison Traps — Limit Screen Time

Social media can create unrealistic expectations by only showing the ‘perfect’ sides of life. Which can lead you to feel inadequate and fall into the comparison trap. 

To avoid this, set limits on your daily screen time and focus more on real-life interactions that can boost your self-worth and build genuine connections. Remember, the idea of perfection online is not the complete story — focus on the unique way God created you, which is SO much more important than any curated online image.

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💖 Explore Related Posts 💖

1. What’s the Root Cause of Perfectionism | 6 Causes
2. 29 Powerful Bible Verses About Self-Love & Worth
3. Self-Sabotaging Meaning, Signs, and How to Stop

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6. Accept and Use Constructive Criticism

Shift your perspective on criticism, look at it as a tool for growth. Embrace feedback, that helps you move forward and improve, rather than dwelling on it as negative judgment. 

7. Practice Saying ‘No’

It’s vital to set boundaries and avoid overcommitting. Saying no helps you manage stress and respect your limits. Saying no to unrealistic expectations from yourself and others lets you spend your time on what truly matters to you — not just on what you think you should be achieving. This is a big step in learning to let go of perfectionism.

If you have a hard time saying no (I struggle saying no too!), here are a couple of examples of what you can say:

1. When asked to volunteer:
   “I really appreciate you thinking of me for this, and I’m honored to be considered. Right now, I need to focus on some personal commitments that require my attention. Please keep me in mind for the future.”
2. When you’re unable to help a friend:
   “I wish I could help out, but I’m unable to give the support you deserve right now. Can we find another way, or maybe someone else who can help?

8. Celebrate Small Wins

Keep a journal to document all your accomplishments — even the small ones! This habit helps shift your focus from what you haven’t done to what you’ve achieved, which can encourage a positive outlook and help you let go of perfectionism.

Here are ways to celebrate small wins…

1. Treat Yourself to a Favorite Treat: Have a small celebration with something you love to eat or drink.
2. Take a Break: Reward yourself with a break to do something you enjoy. This could be reading a book, watching an episode of your favorite TV show, drawing, crafting, or taking an extra-long bath.
3. Share Your Success: Sometimes, just sharing your success with a friend or family member can be a great way to celebrate.
4. Stickers or Visuals: Use stickers or fun visuals in a planner or calendar to mark achievements.

9. Recognize the Role of Your Inner Critic 

Your inner critic might be a defense mechanism that tries to protect you from failure or criticism by pushing you toward perfection. Be aware of when this voice is taking over and consciously choose to listen to more compassionate, realistic thoughts.

This helps shift your mindset towards more supportive and forgiving self-talk.

Here’s How:

1. Start by simply noticing when your inner critic is active. Whenever you catch yourself slipping into self-critical and negative thought patterns, pause and label it: “That’s my inner critic.” 
2. Replace criticism with compassion: Challenge this voice by changing “I always mess up with, “Everyone makes mistakes, and I can learn from this one.” 

We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.

2 Corinthians 10:5 

10. Develop Healthy Coping Strategies for Stress

Perfectionism can become a mental health issue if it leads to excessive stress or anxiety. Manage stress by prioritizing activities that support your mental well-being. These include spending time with loved ones, techniques like deep breathing, physical exercise, practicing meditation or praying, and enjoying hobbies that make you happy. 

These practices not only help reduce stress but also improve physical health and overall well-being — making it easier to handle daily pressures and let go of perfectionism.

11. Learn from Mistakes and Redefine Success

Everyone makes mistakes! When you make mistakes, just remember — it’s the nature of us human beings! Mistakes are an essential part of learning and growth.

Rethink what success means to you… 

Shift from a perfectionist mindset, which often involves setting unrealistic goals, to seeking personal satisfaction and progress. Consider the bigger picture — what truly matters in the long run: nurturing relationships, personal growth, and finding happiness in the present moment.

These changes are crucial as you work toward becoming the best version of yourself — the woman God created you to be —  not perfect, but loved just as you are.

12. Surround Yourself with Supportive People

Build a community that supports your efforts to let go of perfectionism. This network provides encouragement, a safe space to share your struggles and successes, and a reminder that you’re not alone in this journey. 

Actively seek friends who uplift and support you — not those who dwell on criticism. Solid Christian relationships can help you grow, navigate through challenges more easily, and move past unrealistic expectations that often stem from perfectionistic thinking.

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13. Dedicate Time to Spiritual Growth

Nurture your spiritual health. It’s the lifeline to your overall well-being! Investing time in going to church, prayer, and community involvement reinforces God’s truth — that you are valued beyond your accomplishments. 

Meditate on Bible verses that highlight grace, mercy, and the beauty of being imperfect yet deeply loved by God, which will help you let go of perfectionism.

But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

2 Corinthians 12:9

14. Keep a Gratitude Journal

Document not just what you achieve but also what you learn each day. Focusing on gratitude can shift your perspective from a need for perfection to appreciating the abundance of blessings in your life. 

This fosters a mindset that values the learning process and the moments of gratitude that shape a fuller, less-perfection-driven life.

15. Learn to Delegate

From a recovering perfectionist to another… 

I 100% understand how overwhelming the “you don’t have to do everything yourself to make sure it’s done perfectly” situation can be…

However, learning to delegate is a liberating step in letting go of perfectionism. It allows you to trust others with tasks and focus more on what you’re best at. This not only lightens your load but also helps build trust and teamwork.

Trust me on this one — it even makes your family time more enjoyable!

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Let go of perfectionism today for a healthier, more fulfilling life. Remember, as God’s child, your true value is already immense.

Next Steps…

Choose one of these 15 strategies to start with. Remember, there’s a fine line between perfectionistic thoughts and living your life for the glory of God, which is our true purpose. By practicing grace in your goal setting and taking actionable steps, you can enhance all areas of your life without surrendering to the unattainable standards of a perfect life.

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Thank you for joining me on this journey. You are loved, precious, and wonderfully made.

Posted By: Wanda · In: Mindset